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  • Writer's pictureMarcy Kocher


Updated: Nov 4, 2022

According to Brene Brown, in her newest book, The Atlas of the Heart,

“Worry is described as a chain of negative thoughts about bad things that might happen in the future. Worry is the thinking part that leads to anxiety.”

Worry pretends to be necessary.

It FEELS necessary.

We think we need it to prepare for the worst.

We believe it’s what responsible adults do.

It feels like a sense of control, but it’s the opposite.

Worry competes with your desires.

Desire focuses on what you want

Worry focuses on not having it and why you won’t ever have it.

Worry focuses on what you don’t want.

Worry is just what our brains are wired to do. We don’t have to make it wrong.

In fact, you can use worry as a reminder of what you need to think, feel and do to get closer to your desires.

Thanks for the reminder, brain.

When we are fully aware of worry, we can gently shift it into desire.


I started doing this years ago in my prayer life.

I used to pray from fear and worry.

I would beg God to protect my kids and provide for our family and to fix all the problems.

But I never felt better after those prayers.


Because I was focusing on what I did not want in my life.

Then I changed the way I prayed.

I started praying for what I wanted instead of what I didn’t want.

I would pray from thankfulness.

Thank you, God, that you ARE protecting my kids.

Thank you that you DO provide for all our needs.

Thank you that YOU ARE the solution to all my problems.

My brain would calm down, and I could see the good and focus on the solution instead of the problem.

I would feel better, and when I felt better, I did better.


Worry leads to anxiety which keeps us stuck in the very life we are worried about.

Desire creates motivation to take the actions necessary to create the very life we want.

It feels like you don’t have a choice when you worry, but you don’t have to be a slave to worry.

There are tools and techniques to help you be in control of your thoughts, feelings, and actions.

I have a dear friend and client who worked with me for a year on her worry and anxiety.

She says, “This is the most important work I’ve ever done. It is profound. It is life-changing.”

Today she feels more in control than ever. Today she is free to be preset and enjoy the beautiful gift of life.

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